Jill and Derick Dillard recently announced that Jill suffered a miscarriage soon after finding out that she was expecting their third child. Our hearts go out to them during this very difficult time! They posted a short tribute video to YouTube that you can watch.
Sorry to hear this news ❤
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for Jill and Derick :'(
ReplyDeleteSending love and virtual hugs to all the Dillard family. Xo
ReplyDeleteI’m so sorry Jill. My heart goes out to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI'm very sorry Jill and Derick. So heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteI am sad that they are going through this. I'm puzzled why couples today name lost pregnancies at this stage....each to their own, I find it strange.
ReplyDeleteIt's personal preference and can be part of the grieving/healing process. I had two miscarriages. We named one, one we did no. The one we named was a later one where we had had time to make an emotional attachment.
DeleteBecause it's a baby regardless. You can see the flicker of it's heartbeat when doctors are not able to hear it.
DeleteBecause even if a child dies, most people still name him/her. And a lost "pregnancy" is a lost child.
DeleteI don't know any other couples (other than the Duggars) who do this unless the miscarriage happens much later.
DeleteWhy shouldn’t they? There’s really no reason not to.
DeleteBecause it's a baby. What a insensitive opinion you should had kept to yourself.
DeleteI used to think that too - until it happened to me. That was a real baby who deserved a name.
DeleteJust by your comment, I am guessing you have never lost a child? How incredibly insensitive of you. Why go through life just calling their precious child that they lost, "baby?"
DeleteThat is very insensitive. That's like saying why cry at all? It's because its a tiny baby that once had a tiny heart beat. Thats why. Those are the true facts.
DeleteYour words hit me in the gut all over again. I gave all my miscarried babies unisex names. Regardless how your warped of the world feelings are, that comment is so hurtful and insensitive.
DeleteBecause for some couples, it brings comfort, and in a way honors the little life that has been lost. As you find out that you are pregnant, there is hope and dreams for this child. When this image is shattered, it leaves a mark.I named the life i lost, it's Eve, at the same stage as Jill, at 3w 4 days. The tests were positive but the little one did not stick. But at 4 months later i became pregnant with my son. If i hadn't lost my first pregnancy, he wouldn't be here today, so that puts it in a broader perspective for me.
DeleteIt’s not a new thing. Michelle and Jim Bob named the baby they lost after Josh, Caleb. This was back in the late 80s. It’s just a preference that each couple has.
DeleteI named both my lost children. They were loved just as much as our living children. And somehow even though they didn't survive long enough to find out the gender we knew in our hearts that one was a boy and one was girl.
DeleteJust some advice, don't ever say this to a woman that is grieving her loss of pregnancy. That is extremely hurtful. Any stage of pregnancy counts because life does start at conception. You may not hear the heart beat but you can see the pulse or flickers as they call it of the respiratory already working in such a small cell less than a week after implantation. I had a few miscarriages and I can tell you that comment made me feel like I loss them all over again. Don't do that.
DeleteThis comment is really uncalled for and makes me want to cry. You never had a miscarriage have you? I hope you never have to deal with that. I use to believe in worldly things like believing it's just a fetus. I was so wrong about that. And also if it didn't matter at the stage or because it is a fetus, than they wouldn't have memorials for aborted babies at the places you get that done at. It's so sick and wrong. Please be a little bit more respectful to women that is grieving a miscarriage.
DeleteI lost Aspen at 9 weeks and River at 11 weeks. It's been eight years and I still grieve for those babies. My husband and I are in the process of IVF and still no luck other than my body is really getting tired now. You need to be a bit more considerate and careful with your words. You can believe how you want, but don't put it in a grieving mother's face like that because other mothers like me who lost babies will put it right back.
DeleteMany couples do this including myself. Don't be like that to try start stuff to put attention on yourself because clearly you never been through this kind of pain. Don't ever tell a grieving woman this outside whatever real world you face.
DeleteRather this was attended to start something or not, that is very hurtful and not something you should say where there is a high chance of women who also had miscarriages is going to go to for support. Doctors has better bedside manners than that.
DeleteWe should never judge a person for grieving too much… or too little… or in the wrong way. We all grieve differently. Our role is to love and support where we can.
DeleteI posted the original comment. I am 62 with a 41 yo daughter, we have both experienced a pregnancy loss...mine at 17 weeks hers at 7. Asking a question about naming doesn't mean I am insensitive or that I was trying to start something...this is a practice that I simply have not encountered this in my personal life.
DeleteI feel terrible for anyone who goes through this type of loss, dreams unrealized, relationships longed for and never known are so sad. Some of your comments have been so hurtful and rude....thank you to the ones who took the time to share your reasons without a hurtful sling back at me. Questions are how we learn about others and grow in understanding.
@8:52 I am in agreement with you. The older generation is not familiar with the naming of miscarriages, that's all. It isn't judgement, it's only something unusual to them. The question didn't call for the reaction it got.
Delete8:52, I think calling the practice "strange" came across as hurtful and rude to those for whom it's a tender subject.
Delete@1:18
Deletestrange
/strānj/
adjective
1.
unusual or surprising in a way that is unsettling or hard to understand.
"children have some strange ideas"
Similar:
unusual
curious
peculiar
unexpected
unfamiliar
atypical
anomalous
untypical
different
out of the ordinary
out of the way
extraordinary
remarkable
puzzling
mystifying
mysterious
unconventional
2.
not previously visited, seen, or encountered; unfamiliar or alien.
"a harsh accent that was strange to his ears"
8:16, 3. Odd
Delete@1:18 The word "strange" simply means different, unusual, or something not understood. I think you're implying more with the OP's comment than is actually there. He/she simply meant that they thought naming a miscarriage was unusual to them and the clue given was that they were puzzled. Nothing nasty here.
DeleteI agree 3:32. If they had said, "It's ridiculous to name a miscarriage," that would be one thing. But they said it was strange TO THEM. Meaning they are not used to hearing about it, and that's all.
DeletePeople naming their babies that they miscarried at any stage during pregnancy is a common practice but a lot of people don't know this because people don't like talking about miscarriages. Even the ancient egyptians named them and had grand funerals for them. Everyone I knew, my parents knew and my grandparents and great-grandparents did this.
DeleteBecause this is a very sensitive and heart breaking subject no matter how early or late in pregnancy a miscarriage happens. The way you worded stage in pregnancy and naming part was offensive. It should had been asked else where. Not in a blog post about someones miscarriage where other women who had miscarriages going through and believe the same as Jill. I lost a baby I named Vale at 10 weeks. They comment makes me feel because I was so early on that it doesn't matter and it shouldn't be named. I no plenty of women and my great grandmother who miscarried her 8th baby named it. This goes years back. The more we talk about miscarriages, the less taboo it may seem.
DeleteI don't think something like this should had been said where grieving mothers would obviously come too.
DeleteActually, in my 40-plus years, the word strange in conversation around me has almost always been used as a synonym for weird. It could have been worded better - it looks like a lot of commenters were hurt by it.
Delete10:55 PM - Exactly! I think this person knew what they was doing and trying to backtrack now.
DeletePeople are not responsible for someone's reaction or another one feelings. We are responsible for our own feelings and how we react.
Delete6:00, that goes both ways.
DeleteThis person was just looking for attention to be put on them. They knew what they was doing by saying what they said. It's probably the same person who makes comments on here all the time trying to start stuff to drive the attention their way instead of the blog post itself. They want the same attention the Duggar gets.
Delete@2:44 Exactly and they ended up hurting some people like myself who suffered miscarriages. I named every single one. There's to many people seeking attention on this site. They always have to write something bad and than play victim. Or if its a courtship or marriage announcement they have to find something wrong. Its like why keep coming back? This here is going to far.
DeleteMy heart goes out to them and I am glad to see another woman openly admit this as I have suffered many miscarriages myself. It never gets easy no matter how many I had. I still felt pregnant and had the early symptoms a few weeks after miscarrying my babies. My body would go completely crazy and mourning left me sick and anemic. I would not wish this on anyone.
ReplyDeleteMy body did the same thing. It was like it was in denial. Mine lasted a little longer and I got bloated, I looked 6 months pregnant and was having severe stomach pains. And than it went away right along with my symptoms. I woke up and my tummy was flat :(
Delete9:22 PM - Yes, it happened after my D&C. I went back to the doctors twice to make sure nothing was wrong and they said it was normal. My body also did that four months after I gave birth. They said that it's your body way of shrinking down the uterus and this pain/bloating thing it does is more noticeable if you breastfeed which is what I was doing but I had a miscarriage first so not sure why it would of done that too.
DeleteI had four miscarriages and with my first, I was 12 weeks along, it had stopped growing at 9 weeks. I didn't feel like anything was wrong because I my belly was still growing and I had morning sickness. It was like @9:22 said, it was like my body was in denial. I started miscarrying two days later, it was a very horrific thing to go through. I almost thought I was miscarrying twins because of how bad it was and my poor husband didn't know what to do. He is not good with blood to begin with and so I told him it was okay, I just wanted to be alone in my bed until it was over with. After I finally stopped bleeding, I was still bloating and that's when the pain came. I was told I would have it during the miscarrying but that didn't happen. It happened afterwards. I went in to the doctor and they said my body naturally fleshed it out and it's just trying to go back to normal. My breast leaked for two weeks. I had morning sickness for over a month. My body just felt so weird. I lost so much weight after that. I ended up needing a iron transfusion.
DeleteIts the uterus shrinking down. It can happen with both postpartum and after miscarriage.
DeleteSo sorry for them. Such a painful thing to go through.
ReplyDeleteSorry for their loss. She's my favorite Duggar. Sending prayers.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry Jill :(
ReplyDeletePraying for you Jill, Derick, Israel, and Sam. We love you all. Please take good care of yourselves.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about their miscarriage of what would have been their 3rd child. I hope they can be able to have at least 3 children and Jill can someday have a successful pregnancy with her future 3rd child so she and Derick Dillard can have a live siblings for sons Israel and Sam.
ReplyDeletePrays going out to the Dillard Family.🕊❤
ReplyDeletePraying for Jill and Derick and their family. They are such excellent parents and I pray the Lord will bless them with a baby very soon! Miscarriages are heartbreaking, God will help them.
ReplyDeleteAlready see one comment that is uncalled for and knows what they are doing by asking why couples name their child at that stage that will cause a open discussion and argument. Are you that hungry for attention? This blog post is not about you, it's about Jill and Derick and the lost of their BABY.
ReplyDeleteIKR! It's just sad there has to be people like that every time someones announces a miscarriage. We have to talk about stuff like this because at the time I went through miscarriages I felt alone.
DeleteEXACTLY!
DeleteAsking about the practice of naming a miscarriage is not uncalled for. It's an opportunity for people to explain why, without getting angry.
DeleteWhy are you and everyone else jumping all over the person that posted that question? I think they genuinely want to know. My grandma lost a set of twins, and I was never told that she and my grandpa named them. It might not have been common 50+ years ago to name a miscarried baby?
DeleteI don't think the comment that asked that was unkind....it's ok to have a different opinion.
DeleteExactly to 9:04, 11:12, and 12:40. I don't believe it was common until recently to name a miscarriage. A stillborn baby, yes. A fetus or baby you had a funeral for, yes. But a miscarriage that was so early you couldn't determine the gender, no, not unless you did it privately. You did not name it and tell everyone. Miscarriages were not openly discussed the way they are these days. Women talked to women, but usually miscarriages were hush-hush and you didn't let everyone know (the way Jill just shared). I can go back 100 years with women I know or am related to, all experiencing miscarriages, and not one ever said that they had named the miscarriage. Is it better these days, when everyone shares the news? Probably. It's a relief to many women to be able to talk about what happened and have others sympathize.
DeleteMy mother had 3 miscarriages in the 1940's and 50's, kept them private, and never even thought of names. I heard the details when I got old enough (she always wondered what the genders would have been) but never once were there names. It wasn't done, so don't get mad now at someone who asks about it being done these days. Remember, there are readers here of all ages and the older ones have their own experiences to relate. Not saying the naming is wrong or a bad thing, just pointing out that it's different now than it was decades ago, so you can have some understanding of where others are coming from. Society has changed a lot since some of us were born, and things these days can certainly be puzzling. The first computer I used was bigger than two refrigerators. If you had told me that within 30-40 years it would be so small it would fit in my pocket and I would be connected to the entire world through it, I'd have said you were crazy, it isn't done...
100% agreed. Its common to name a baby after miscarriage. Not a lot of public figures do this which makes people think it's uncommon and some couples want to keep the name to themselves.
DeleteWell, calling it "strange" was unkind as well.
Delete@9:29 Maybe it's common these days but during my reproductive years and the reproductive years of all my friends and family, nobody ever did that, not for an early miscarriage. Maybe for a stillbirth later on when a baby was delivered and a burial planned, but not early on. Go back in history - there are cemeteries full of "Baby Smith" or "Baby Jones" headstones, when people didn't even name a stillbirth or a child that only lived for a few hours or a few days.
DeleteAlmost everyone I knew that had a miscarriage always named the baby. In my parents generation they did the same thing. My grandma did with some babies she lost and my great-grandma. This has been happening for years. The problem is people don't talk about miscarriages often because left wings don't want the world to mourn a unborn baby because it contradicts their agenda to allow women to take away another human right to live when they are innocent regardless the situation.
Delete@12:59 my great grandma named her 8th child she miscarried early on. I stated this before the more we talk about miscarriages the less taboo it seems to name a miscarried child. It happens a lot and even way back then. Some people keep it private for many reasons but that doesn't help other women.
Delete@12:59 Yes - I used to wander the historic cemeteries near my small New England town and there were always numerous graves of unnamed babies. It was heartbreaking to see that some lived only a day or two, and some were buried along with their mothers who died on the same day. Childbirth could be so dangerous back then.
Delete1:05 PM - I have a old 1800s graveyard in my town where there was named unborn babies.
Delete@2:42 Named unborn babies? What?
Delete9:52, the person probably met miscarriages and stillborns. We have a old cemetery in my town like that that goes back to 1600s. It's pretty rad.
DeleteI had twelve miscarriages and two stillborns. It's the hardest thing I ever had to go through. I am not a earthly mother, but I am a mother somewhere else and I believe I will see them again. My heart hurts for them and anyone going through that. I would not wish infertility on anyone. For years I felt less of a woman. I felt lost. And I tell you all these people who are lucky enough to have children that believes it's the woman's right to take away another humans life away does not deserve their children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and so on. Forbid this but if they believe the way they do and their daughter, daughter-in-law, granddaughter or niece ever came to them crying that they miscarried, don't you dare shed a tear. Do what you do to people online and say "it's just a fetus" and "get over it"... See what happens and see how many family and friends you have left in your life. Because that's what happened to me by my own mother and aunt at the worse time in my life. "Get over it"... "It's just a fetus, this happened to you plenty of times. Suck it up."
ReplyDeleteI am SO VERY SORRY you had to deal with that!!! That’s SO WRONG!!!! I lost 6, and I recall people saying things like, “Oh God will give you another!” It hurt like crazy, cuz even tho we managed 4 living children, we never forget the ones we lost!!! Sending you hugs 🤗
DeleteI'm so incredibly sorry to hear how people responded to you in the deepest, darkest days of your life. I wish I could just give you a hug. I have not experienced this myself but I can certainly empathize with it being so heartbreaking and horrible. I pray you have had some friends who understand the many losses you have faced.
DeleteOh, my goodness, I'm so sorry your own family members ever said those things to you about your precious babies.
DeleteMy heart goes out to you on the tremendous loss and sorrow you have suffered. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy 41 years ago, and then five years ago we lost our 27 year old son. There is such heartbreak in this life but as believers we know the best is yet to come. I truly believe that the Lord will more than make up for your losses when you finally see Him face to face and I know it will be a most joyous reunion for you to be reunited with those 14 precious little lives. Just keep picturing all of your children together and the welcome they will give you one day. God bless you, dear one.
DeleteI am so sorry you had to go through this. I had strangers in the waiting room after my ultrasound that confirmed my miscarriage tell me the same thing which was not needed at finding out very upsetting news. This woman had a baby in her arms too. I will never forget her face. And yet the receptionist told me to leave, not the woman that got me even more upset. I never went back to that place again and what's funny is that the place got closed down for a while because the whole staff got fired.
DeleteMy heart breaks for you. I'm so sorry you had to endure such incredible losses and to have family say those things to you, well I just can't imagine the pain you've gone through. I wish you peace and healing and also to be surrounded by loving, kind people who understand.
DeleteOmg I am so sorry. This world has no compassion at all. I seen this happened way to many times and it's not right.
DeleteI’m so sorry you had to go through all this…..just unimaginable..BUT if you believe in Jesus Christ you will have 14 babies in heaven to see….what a JOY that will be!
DeleteThere is a lot of cold hearts in this world. I am so sorry you had to go through something like that.
DeleteMy heart hurts for you. God bless.
DeleteMy mother-in-law did this to me and than She had the nerve to cry after her daughter had a miscarriage.
DeleteI am sorry you did not get the medical help you needed to determine why you lost all those pregnancies. There could have been a problem that could have been fixed, by surgery or medication.
DeleteThose you tell women who have lost pregnancies to 'get over it' are not saying that to be cruel or insensitive. They are coming from a place of concern. Life continues and extended grief over a miscarriage does not help the woman nor it is healthy. You never forget, of course, but life goes on.
It is never too late to seek professional help for your feelings. By the way, no one deserves to have children. It is nothing we earn; it is just a fact of biology. And not having children does not make you less of a woman.
I'm so sorry :'(
DeleteI am so sorry! Pregnancy or postpartum or miscarriage, you need your mama. I know I did through a few miscarriages I had. I wish I had been there to help you through that. I went in to early menopause after my last miscarriage. I did not have good fertility specialist and doctors at the time to help me understand why this was happening. I am sending big hugs your way. Nobody deserves to be treated like that especially what you was going through.
DeleteI feel sorry for everyone especially Jill and Derick for the loss of their 3rd baby. I'm praying that you guys hopefully will have another healthy and happy 😊 baby in the future. Natasha b
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for Jill and Derick's loss. Christian
ReplyDeleteThis was very sad to hear & my heart & prayers go out to Jill, Derick & their boys. I’m sure if a pregnancy is meant to happen it will but right now you need time to grieve & come to terms with your sad loss. Much kindness is being sent to you all. RIP little one 👼
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear this. Heartbreaking. I read that they have love and support from family and friends, which is so important. Jinger, Joy, and Jessa also had heartwarming comments for Jill and family. My prayer is that you can heal, and God willing, a rainbow baby will follow. Take care, Jill and family.
ReplyDeleteI am truly sorry Jill and Derick having to go through this. It's not something I share all the time but I had a lot of miscarriages and I had fertility treatments. My body went through a lot and all for nothing. However, I trust that there is a reason for everything.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear! I pray that they find comfort and peace in Jesus during this difficult time!
ReplyDeleteI was very sorry to hear this news.
ReplyDeleteDear Jill!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am sooooo sorry to hear that, really, I feel, bad/sad for U!!!! But, I know U are made of iron, U can survive anything!!!!! U are strong, and U have your wonderful family of 4, Fab 4, U will OK,OK, and I love U,JIll very much, U are my #1 Duggar Kids, so I really feel, when U are sad!!!! Love U 4, and for now I am going to say I love U 4/5, so U know I am honour him/her OK!!!!!
Justine, you are such an encouraging person. Your comments always make me smile. Kim
DeleteSorry for their loss of River Bliss!
ReplyDeleteJill did not say how many weeks along she was. If very early on, why do women test to early? Sometimes, it's better to not know.
ReplyDeleteNot true. If you are pregnant you need to know so you can avoid certain medications, exposure to chemicals, etc.
DeleteHave you not been pregnant before? You want to know as early as possible so you can be careful of your health to protect the baby in the early stages of development. There are things you shouldn't take, eat, and drink. Your body usually starts giving you signs within a few weeks of conceiving, which is why you would think to test that early. It is not true that it is better not to know.
DeleteMy daughter recently had a positive pregnancy test, she started spotting, went to the doctor and they did an ultrasound.....there wasca sac with no fetal tissue, she thought she was 7 weeks. All these people saying you can see the heart beating even if you can't hear it might be wrong. Jill didn't have an ultrasound and from the sound of it was only 3 or 4 weeks...every positive pregnancy test is not a "baby". I agree this super early testing results in many unnecessary broken hearts. We might be really excited about the positive test, tell family and friends and in the words of my daughter...feel like the one that had to let everyone down.
DeleteIt's good to know early though, especially if you have a regular period that suddenly (if miscarrying) it picks up differently or you suddenly think you are starting without it being that time. Being well planned is the key and making sure you are making healthy choices.
DeleteBecause it's one of the most exciting moments of your life. We couldn't wait to take a pregnancy test and we couldn't wait to tell everyone we knew. Nothing wrong with that.
Deleteshe might have had some fertility treatment, then you know eaely.
DeleteI had an early miscarriage myself. I have a son and with the last short pregnancy I felt like I did when I was pregnant the 1st time. It was a faint line but it was there so I knew. I didn't tell anyone and then a few days later it happened:(.
DeleteIt depends if you are tracking. Also knowing early can detect possibly dangerous ectopic pregnancies as well. Those early kits saved my cousins life. There's so much that could go wrong between the 6-10 week mark.
DeleteI can tell you what it was like before home tests and you didn't always know. You just knew that something might be "different" one month, but that was it. The only thing that sticks with you in that case is the wondering, not really any grief, because you never knew for sure if there was something to be sad about or if your body was just acting differently for a moment, which bodies can do. I'm talking about something every early on, and even if there were tests back then, they might not have picked it up. You'd be left to wonder and never could prove anything, if it was really early. So I don't know which is best, being able to test and being left with sadness, or not being able to test and being left with wondering.
Delete9:16; I had a situation just like that 40 years ago. I still think about it sometimes.
DeleteThese home pregnancy tests have a 1% false-positive rate. Although not a high rate, woman should wait to take the tests until they are sure they are late.
DeleteAlso, chemical pregnancies have been estimated to occur in about 50% of all conceptions. Conception has occurred but the egg failed to developed because of some serious chromosome problem. It is nature's way. Most women, unless they took a very early pregnancy test, do not even know they were pregnant. Their period was just late.
Perhaps this is what happened to Jill and why the Duggars seem to have a high rate of reported miscarriages.
How sad, another death in this family. Duggar girls and Duggar wives sure have a lot of miscarriages. :(
ReplyDeleteThe mother had two miscarriages. We tend to follow our mom's pregnancy. And miscarriages as painful as they are are more common than people think. It's been going on for years. Ancient Egyptians had more respect for miscarriage and had funerals for the baby even in early stage.
DeleteMiscarriages (especially early ones) are super common. Which is still super sad but the Duggar’s don't have an abnormal amount, they just test super early.
Delete11:26 - Exactly. Some women especially of you have a heavy cycle, won't even know they had one :(
DeleteMy heart goes out to Jill, Derick and their boys on this sad loss. May God give them His comfort and peace now and always. I just love their sweet little family.
ReplyDeleteJill and Derek and the boys,you have my heartfelt condolences on this terrible loss. There really are no words that are adequate at a time like this. God bless your your beautiful baby and each one of you.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry Jill,Derick,Israel and Samuel for your loss. God Bless. Rest in peace River Bliss Dillard.
ReplyDeleteJoan,Marion and Marilyn
This is so very sad. It seems as if an inordinate amount of this family's young ladies are losing babies.
ReplyDeleteI think it's an ordinate amount compared to women overall, the Duggar girls just talk about it more openly.
DeleteIt's estimated that as many as 25% of all early pregnancies end in miscarriage. The numbers may be higher, as some women miscarry so early they don't even know they're pregnant.
DeleteTo Jill and Derek and all those who have lost a child I am so sorry. Praying for all of you
ReplyDeleteI was hoping that Jill and Derick were done having kids and that once Sam starts school, Jill would either get a job or further her education. I would love to see her have a career!
ReplyDeleteThat's her choice. Be a bit more sensitive right now.
DeleteBeing a spouse, parent, and home manager ARE careers!!!!!!
DeletePreach it, 11:58! Just because we don't get money for it, it doesn't mean what we do is not vital and fulfilling.
DeleteAs a woman with a ton of education, I support a large family through my work and our mission. I never thought I would feel this way but I would love to be a stay at home mom. To be able to nurture my kids full time would be so awesome. i hope she feels she has chosen to be a wife and mother. if so, she really has the best job in the world.
DeleteI'm highly educated in a profession from top undergrad and grad schools, and I strongly beg to differ. Let Jill do what SHE and her husband believe is best for their family. Higher education (nowadays) and a career are very overrated, and being a stay at home mom is very underrated, IMO.
Delete@10:59 Well, I've done both- highly educated/professional career, and a SAHM. There are definitely pros and cons to both, IMO. I'm glad and fortunate that I could experience both. Now that I'm retired, I'm awfully glad I have a very good pension from my job and the means to support myself.
Delete11:58 Those are temporary jobs. Kids grow up and leave home. A woman does herself a huge favor by having an education and/or job skills to fall back on. Life has a way of throwing curve balls and you can't necessarily depend on a man to support you forever. That's just the way it is.
Delete6:32, 18-plus year jobs are not "temporary."
Delete6:32 PM - That is your opinion. When my children left the nest, I did get a very nice job with just a high school education. You can actually depend on a man if you want but that's your choice. Everyone has a choice. Neither is wrong. That's just the way it is :)
DeleteRather you are a working woman or a homemaker, it doesn't matter and neither one is any better than the other. Usually people who have college degrees dont constantly go around on the internet arguing and saying women are better for it. I don't know one person who has a college degree that would do and say stuff like that unless you are one of those privileged Karens. Sorry but not sorry some people on this site don't sound mature at all.
DeleteJust my own opinion, but we've encouraged our daughter to pursue her gifts and talents (she's interested in the counseling field) and get a college education. If she meets "Mr. Right" along the way, so be it. If she finds the right guy later and wants to be a SAHM (and has the ability), she'll have those skills to fall back on should she need them later in life at any point or should she want to continue or return to counseling. Not saying college is fa must have or for everyone, just that based on my life experience and what I've seen, I think it gives you more choices later on.
DeleteSome of the couples will limit themselves to 1 or 2 kids. That’s smart!
ReplyDelete19x2=38. But 19x19= 361. Yikes!
Jill didn't have a choice, she had a miscarriage! What kind of comment is this?
DeleteAnd you know this how? None have said they are limiting their offspring number.
DeleteSo far they have 10 kids married and 21 grandkids. It's a long road to 361.
DeleteMost probably they will have 3-4 kids each, on average. For example I can't imagine Jeremy Vuolo having 6 children, but Kendra and Joe might go for even more.
@4:10 PM - Ya'll.... that's their business lol.
DeleteI'm sorry to hear of their loss. Bet they have been trying for Baby Dilly #3 for awhile just to have their hopes and expectations dashed with this miscarriage. At least she can have the support of her sisters Jessa and Joy and sister in-laws Anna and Lauren who all have suffered miscarriages and even her mom Michelle who has miscarried twice. That is if they all are on speaking terms with her at all. Hope they can try again when they are ready. It sounds like Jill and Derrick must want their kids spaced 3 years apart to make it easier on cost of diapers and formula and have them out of diapers and potty trained before the next baby. Smart plan.👍😁 Hope this loss can open the barriers just a crack to reconcile with Jill's parents and some of her siblings that won't talk to her finally. Praying for them.
ReplyDeleteJinger had a miscarriage too
Delete10:59PM: And Jinger had a miscarriage as well.
ReplyDeletePraying for you Jill! So sorry to hear this news,
ReplyDeleteI hope all of you give the same level of understanding and compassion to the women who have to end their pregnancies for some reason, be it physical or personal. Why would they not deserve the same sympathy for their situation?
ReplyDeleteI waited awhile to comment. This is a painful subject. I had five miscarriages. After that I was told it was impossible for me to conceive again. When this happened my relationship with my husband changed dramatically. His mother was putting stuff in his ears and he ended up leaving me for a woman that could have children. He literally told me "I have to have kids, I'm sorry." That's it. He left and divorce papers came my way. It took me a long time after the divorce to forgive him. While dealing with the loss of my babies and going through divorce, I felt like I was in a nightmare. A year after the divorce I was diagnosed with cancer and they completely had to do a full hysterectomy. I went into a deep depression for 30+ years until 2018 I got help and I been doing so much better since. I even got off disability to work again. I found life again. I had a friend I grew up with who ended her pregnancy and I was so angry with her. She had the financially means to take care of that baby, but at the time being a unwed mom at her age would had been scandal. I stopped talking to her and she came back around the time I was in therapy telling me she regretted it. She can not have children either. That baby she chose to end it's life could had been her only chance. For those who want to end your pregnancy unless it was conceived in a terrible way, you really need to rethink. People say the system is corrupted and children end up in bad homes - that is RARE. If you are not ready to be a mother, you give that baby to someone who can't have kids. I now work in this field and I help children. The media lies so they can try to make ending a unborn child's life justified. Soon as the sperm enters the egg, there is a pulse before the actual full respiratory track is formed. The same pulse turns into a flicker where you can now detect the movement on the ultrasound before the heart beat is detected. Life DOES START AT CONCEPTION. That is a fact.
DeleteIf it came about a dark way that's different but any other way, it's wrong and I have no compassion for them. I would die to make sure my baby lived. Not a lot of women who believe in ending a unborn baby's life could say the same, they only care about their lives.
DeleteHere's how I see it, if it wasn't wrong and it's just a fetus, than why does some of these clinics have private memorials for the women that decided to end their pregnancy? That makes no since and completely contradicts their argument.
DeleteEveryone always looks to the Ancient Egyptians since the 1920s to today, they had grand funerals for miscarriages and yet we aren't suppose to cry now when it happens but you want us to show compassion for someone that chose to end a life? Nope. Never.
DeleteBecause Jill had a miscarriage which is horrible for a mother that prayed for a baby and their family wanted that precious baby🙏 Not like woman who are killing their babies and saying it was only tissue and cells etc…. God created life from conception Period! I pray for these woman having abortions as they have been deceived by the world but a day of judgment is coming and I pray that they come to the Lord and ask for forgiveness 🙏🙏
DeleteChoosing to end someone else's life is not the same thing at all.
DeleteNot unless it was forced.
DeleteMiscarriages are not a choice.
DeleteHow dare you. You are looking for attention. I don't feel anything for someone that purposely did it to themselves that usually ends up regretting later in life. They will always live with half a soul for taking a soul away.
DeleteIt's kinda hard to give them the same compassion since they had the opportunity to carry it to full term and give the baby to someone who would actually cherish it. Someone with a miscarriage didn't have a choice. Now granted I understand if it was forced/R or some other dark way but there is a fine line of ending a precious life all because you wasn't ready to be a mama. If you are ready to do the deed, you better be ready to face the consequences because birth control does not always work.
DeleteGood question 6:26. If your body rejects a pregnancy for medical reasons, it's sympathy. If you need a doctor's help to get your body to do that for medical reasons, it's quite the opposite.
DeleteNumerous doctors have stated that there's absolutely no reason to kill the baby to save the life of the mother. You deliver the baby, if need be, then do your best to keep the baby alive. If a woman kills her baby on purpose for convenience, why would you expect us to feel sorry for her as we do for a Mom who lost a wanted baby through no act of her own???
DeleteI like how women also use the excuse I have to end the pregnancy otherwise I'll die. If the doctor told me I would die if I didn't end the pregnancy, but they told me the infant would live if I proceed. I would die to save the baby. Period. Women today are not strong at all and they also like to leave their kids any chance they get. Woman up and take on your responsibilities.
Delete@10:57 Are those "numerous doctors" members of the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology? Because their doctor members agree that there certainly are medical reasons to end a pregnancy. They are the 60,000 member organization that sets the guidelines for doctors to use. I'd really like to know who the doctors are who you're referring to.
Delete9:31, If you were told you'd die if you didn't end the pregnancy, how would you expect the baby to live if you were dying or if you died? What scenario would that mean? How would that impact the baby's health, a baby who depends on the mother for oxygen? What heroic efforts would that require? Seems it would also be a decision you'd make with your partner, taking into account any other children in the home already. I don't think that's a question of not being strong or being irresponsible. If you have other children, then you'd have responsibilities already.
Delete@4:46 You got it.
DeleteI have heard stories of women who were urged to abort for "medical reasons" by their doctors, and refused. They went on to either have perfectly healthy babies or to be thankful for the time they got to spend with their babies - alive - before the babies passed away from inoperable conditions.
DeleteThank you @9:19! This is exactly how I feel. Lord forbid I was in that situation and I was told my baby would live, even if there was a 50-50 to a lower chance of survival, I would still die for my baby.
Delete5:17 Would you die for your unborn child even if you had living children at home?
Delete6:25 PM - Yes, I would still die for them. Would you die to protect your living children? People also use the excuse of having other children but you are still not guarantee to always be around. You could die for a illness or wreck. So yes again I will say I still die for the baby regardless because I also know I have family to take care of the children I already have and the baby that I saved.
Delete@2:38 Wouldn't your family, who has to carry on without you, have a say in the matter? They may feel left behind...
Delete2:28pm preach it. As a mother sadly you never know when your time is up so that is a losing argument. I would die to save my children and my unborn child if need be.
DeleteHey 6:25, that's like saying you should never become a parent if there is a chance you'll die during their childhood. That's something you can't control anyway. That's also like saying, "I have 4 children. Lightning is about to strike one but I can't push him/her out of the way and save them because of the other children." Yeah, don't become a parent.
Delete4:27 PM - I agree with you wholeheartedly. That is sad that you have to even say it but it's true. Some of these people do not need to be parents.
DeleteMy husband knew full well, going in, that if something happened, he was to save the baby. I've already lived, the baby should get the same chance.
DeleteWhy would you be so rude to a family who has lost an unborn child; if you or a family member had experienced loss you would have compassion, if you can't be nice, please leave the blog. Prayers for Jill, Derrick, Samuel and Israel
ReplyDeleteThat's the trouble with putting all your business on social media. Comments will be made and not all of them are going to be nice. I stay away from social media for that reason.
Delete11:59 AM - People have a odd notion that it's their duty to be like this and it's not. They are lucky to share their lives at all.
DeleteNot everyone can have 19 children like Michelle.
ReplyDeleteJill also had issues with labor and delivery of her boys. Motherhood does not come easy to her.
4 weeks, 3 days...so did Jill have a medical follow up or was this all from the test stick? I believe it makes a difference to have a real physician confirm that something did conceive. Did Jill ever say?
ReplyDeleteOver the counter tests are as accurate as the ones used by physicians. False positives happen less than 1% of the time. Some women can tell they're pregnant even without a test. And miscarrying early on is different than a normal period, so that would be an indicator for her too. I'm sure Jill wouldn't have shared if she wasn't certain. Doctors could have tested her blood for lowering HCG levels but if she felt she knew what was going on why do it? So she could show more proof of her loss? Unnecessary in my opinion.
DeleteI'm sorry for your ad. I said a prayer.
ReplyDelete6:37 And what will a prayer about a miscarriage do? And if there is no prayer what will that do?
Delete6:55 PM - It helps ease the comfort. Don't be like that.
Delete6:55, prayer in this situation would be for comfort for Jill and her family.
Delete@ 6:55 Prayer often brings comfort to many people who are hurting or going through a rough time. If you believe in God, it's comforting to know that people are speaking to God on your behalf specifically.
Delete6:55 PM - Because it helps. Time doesn't heal. Only Jesus can do that.
DeletePrayers don't help everyone. I am offended when someone says they will "pray for" me. Acknowledge that I can be strong enough to solve my problems myself, given enough time and support from friends. I want actions, not vague, empty "prayers." If someone I knew had a miscarriage, I'd be there with food, offers of cleaning or errand running, offers to babysit, and an ear to listen, not "prayers."
Delete9:45 I've found that time does heal to a certain extent. You don't ever get over grief completely, but time has a way of smoothing out its sharp edges.
Delete1:16 PM - Everytime humans try to fix things, matters usually always get worse. We are human after all. I know prayer works and I am sad you don't believe that. I have a family member that is living proof of how powerful prayer really is and this person was not suppose to survive what they did.
Delete@1:16 PM - If prayers offend you, than why even comment at all under a person that says they are going to say a prayer? If something offends someone, the normal thing to do is just walk away from it. Also the Duggar's are Christian who believe in praying. Seems a bit odd.
Delete9:45 - 100% The pain will still be there with time but Jesus takes that completely way <3
Delete@5:20 You're saying that without prayer, the person would not have survived? What about the skill of the medical team? I don't believe that one person gets favored over another just because people pray for them. Also, lots of people have been prayed for that didn't have the same outcome. So it doesn't prove prayer works.
Delete1:16, ok but this is about you? Jill and derick have said they appreciate prayers so OP’s comment was a response to that. Your comment was unnecessary.
DeleteIf you pray for a person you have to tell them or their loved one. Otherwise it doesn’t bring comfort, right? But the prayer can cure the ailing person even if you don’t tell the person. Right? Are these the rules?
Delete8:47 PM - I never heard such a thing. I have living proof that prayer works. And no I did not tell the person.
DeleteI m so sorry for Jills and Derricks loss.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure she did but that really is this business.
ReplyDeleteIt's sad to see a lot of grumpy people looking for attention since it's on Jill and all those who suffered miscarriages.
ReplyDeleteI had 2 miscarriages and 2 abortions. I named them all. I put up little white crosses in the backyard for all 4 of them.
ReplyDeleteBro what? If you care about your baby enough to name it why kill it
Delete9:40 It’s probably ok to name the embryo or fetus after the abortion. But certainly not before!
ReplyDeleteI agree. Names help the mom remember.
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