Did you hear the big news that was announced today? Justin is in a relationship! He and Claire Spivey have known each other since last spring, and they both love God, the outdoors, and snowboarding.
Photo courtesy duggarfamily.com
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These people just get more ridiculous every day.
ReplyDeleteSo you felt like you needed to leave that comment for what reason? Just to spread negativity? Just to ruin this excellent news for poor Justin? No one wants to hear so keep your negativity & your negative thoughts to yourself. Do the world a favor. If you don't like them then don't read about them it's that easy.
DeleteWho are 'these people'???
DeleteTime 2:45AM Tues 9/22/20
DeleteThat's rude to make a comment like
That no Duggar fan would make a comment like these people just get more ridiculous every day. I mind your
Comment every rude.
Yep
DeleteWhy,if it's normal for other 17 year olds to date why can't it be for them to date with a purpose,after all if they realise they have found the one and marry in a years time he will only be the same age as Kendra and Joy were when they married and I don't see them struggling with their marriage and being parents,remember years ago it was normal to marry young because people were more mature,and I believe these kids are too after all we see them working in many difficult projects like construction like young men did years ago that's why they were mature enough for marriage they were responsible,while most 17 year olds these days play video games party and avoid all type of responsability that's why they are not mature enough to marry.
DeleteYou're right. 17 year olds are never in relationships that might end up in marriage some day. 🙄
DeleteI totally agree, any parent who would allow children this young to enter into serious relationships such as this when their brains aren't even fully developed is guilty of child abuse in my opinion. I just pray that God intervenes and does what's right for these children
DeleteThat's what I was thinking about you 🤔. Why are you reading about ridiculous people anyway? Let me guess you are form public school were kids start dating in 5th grade, but when the Duggar's wait until after they have graduated then that's ridiculous 😂😂🤣
DeleteThen why are you here?
DeleteSince they live in different states, it's obvious the parents are facilitating this romance. Sad.
DeleteI’d kindly like to remind everyone to take the log out of their own eye before they point out the splinter in someone else’s. I myself am guilty of that and so just trying to help bring that into perspective.
Deleteso dating and having casual physical relationships with others while 17 and younger is OK? However, taking a relationship cautiously and purposeful by getting to know each others beliefs and goals for the future is definitely wrong.... OK, this world is completely upside down.
DeleteOP you get nothing but support from me. I agree.
DeleteI no longer comment because there are people who use others names. The first Eileen.
DeleteAt 1043 pm, just because people are concerned about the young age of the couple and all the problems that could cause does not make them “haters” or negative. You act like people have to completely agree with all the choices the Duggar’s make. I’m wondering if you would even say anything if YOU thought the Duggar’s were doing anything wrong. There are a lot of concerns about a couple this young. If you look at just how many people are in agreement about concern over this issue it should at least give you pause to ponder it. They can’t all be negative hateful people as you put it 🙄
DeleteTime 4:25PM Wed 9/23/20
DeleteHOW WOULD U KNOW? U GOT NO PROOF
THE PARENTS ARE FACILITATING THIS
ROMANCE. DONT ASSUME SOMETHING LIKE THAT U HAVE NO PROOF OF.
@7:27 Whether they are mature enough or not is a matter of conjecture. In any event, why rush into marriage when it's making a lifetime committment? Waiting a few years is not a big deal.
DeleteAnonymous @4:01 asserted that the parents are facilitating this romance because Justin has obviously spent time in Texas with Claire and her family (with his parents permission and hers), as well as Claire and her family have come to Arkansas. He also had to fly there, meaning he either purchased a standard airline ticket and flew there (his parents would have knowledge of that he wasn't at home in Arkansas), he flew himself in a Duggar plane (either his parents had knowledge he was making the trips or else one of their planes was missing), one of his brothers flew him to Texas on a Duggar plane (his parents would know he wasn't at home in Arkansas for days at a time), or one of his friends flew him to Texas (his parents would know he wasn't at home in Arkansas). Justin had to have been spending money as well whether that was paying for a flight, airplane fuel, a pilot, a chaperone's meals, his own meals/lodging in Texas, or taking Claire out for dates in Texas or when she visited in Arkansas. Courting in the Duggar household is very much a family affair, complete with younger siblings being assigned to chaperone outings, older siblings, and parental chaperones. Her parents obviously had to have been in on as well, permitting her to travel to Arkansas and him to come to Texas. In between, if you follow the Duggars, you'll know that the person in a courting relationship is "freed" from other responsibilities to be able to spend time with their intended and in texting and Skyping/Zoom calls (the idea being spending lots of chaperoned time with that person to more fully observe their character to determine if they're a suitable mate). So, yes the parents (as well as both families) were in fact facilitating the romance (encouraging it and helping it along).
DeleteWaiting a few years is not a big deal? It's not a big deal to not bond your soul to the one you believe God made for you? It's not a big deal to not be able to live together and see each other whenever you want to? It's not a big deal to not be able to go out into the world together and make a difference? It's not a big deal to not be able to start the family you want so much? How is that not a big deal?
DeleteNo one is promised a few years. No one is promised tomorrow. Get married young. Grow up together. Truly bond and be one with each other. That is real love, real marriage, and real honor and service to God.
Claire already said she found the man of her dream's. To youg to make statement like that. Believe parent's tend to push toward's families they know who have kid's same age to encourage the relationship's. Relax be with friend's each enjoy being single and then down the road after real life experience try them. Have a Blessed Day
DeleteToo often the man of your dreams exists only in your dreams. When you wake up, you realize you were dreaming. Statements like Claire's only show immaturity.
Delete1:56 I'm sorry, but I don't think a teenager has a very good perspective on who their soul is supposed to be bonded to for life. They're still trying to figure out what to do for a living and it's simply not reasonable to bring a spouse and possible children into the mix. The Duggars are a different kettle of fish, in that the dad seems to have control over the finances and what his kids are going to do by working for him. They've also had a successful TV show for many years, to help pad the bank account. That's a far cry from the average senior in high school. However, even so, I don't think any teenager is ready for marriage, including a Duggar. Hopefully, it works out and they're happy. It wouldn't be anything I would encourage my own kids to do.
DeleteTo the first Eileen, You can comment and say Anonymous.
DeleteThat is so awesome, Justin! Please don't listen to the haters. They obviously have pathetic leaves to have all that negativity. You don't need to pay them any attention. Just be happy. Enjoy!! Stay safe & healthy!
ReplyDeletePeople can have concerns without being “pathetic haters” The odds are not in their favor based on their incredibly young age. Just curious if you would applaud ANY choice the Duggar’s make, even if you thought it was wrong. It’s a good thing that people can express their concerns and have free speech
DeleteNo need to cast stones or call names. Agreeing wholeheartedly with Anonymous @ 6:22- Expressing concern doesn't automatically brand someone a hater or negative. Actually, quite the contrary, it expresses love and care for the two people involved in the situation and is usually generated by the commenters lifetime experience observing others and having firsthand knowledge of adolescent behavior, the actual nuts and bolts of marriage (as opposed to romantic idealism), the pressure of life, and the real work involved in loving another fallible human being for the long haul (the consistent practice of each spouse putting the other's interests above their own on a daily basis 24/7,365/lifetime). I've yet to read one comment that says Justin and Claire aren't going to make it (that actually would be negativity). Many posters here have real life experience; Justin and Claire simply do not. Real life experience is paying rent in your place, utilities, life insurance, car insurance, gas, medical & dental bills, planning menus, buying groceries, fixing the meals & clean-up, doing all of your own household (including laundry & cleaning toilets) yourself, balancing the checkbook, setting and keeping the budget, working a full-time job (preferably one you filled out the job application yourself, landed the interview, and got hired for on your own merit), and saving for emergencies/vacations/future children/retirement. Otherwise, you're just playing house.
DeleteOur son started dating his now fiancee when he was 17. That was 8 years ago. At 17, he really liked her, but he was also focused on attending university for 4 years, and building experience toward his future career. He wasn't focused solely on marriage. They both did very well in university, have really good careers, they got engaged, bought a home, but had to postpone their wedding because of covid. Justin and Claire should be focusing on education, character building, experience outside of the Duggar bubble, careers, making money for stability, while staying focused on God and their religion. They can still love each other and grow their relationship, but they should grow up first and grow to their full potential.
ReplyDeleteI believe people's concern over his age has more to do with the duggars quick courtship. Since most are married in a year or less, this would negate any education (as they also don't have the ladies continue careers after marriage).
DeleteExactly. If the relationship endures as your son's did, then it's a good one. There's no need to rush into marriage until you're better equipped to earn a living.
Delete8 yrs and still not married? Yet they are living together? That is considered common-law marriage and has as many legal implications as if they had signed a paper.
DeleteOr you can do what God leads you to do, get married, and build your life together. I find it so sad when people have focused so much on their career and "finding themselves" that they are incapable of truly bonding and meshing with their spouse. If you are so obsessed with being a separate, fully formed person before marriage, you will never be able to give of yourself wholly and have a real, true marriage. You'll be roommates who sleep together.
DeleteExept when you can not be alone with your fiancee until you are married, because your parents don't trust you... They just don't have the patience to chaperone and be chaperoned for more than a year....
Delete1:54 You are making a wild assumption, that people who marry later are doomed to unhappiness. I married at 35 for the first time and we’re still happily married 30 years later. I do treasure my college education and career. I also am now retired with a nice pension. BTW, I think it’s often the young wife, with no education or job experience, who may sacrifice the most down the road. You cannot expect that there will always be a man to support you. Stuff happens. In any event, people need to find their own paths in life, not be dictated or pressured by others.
Delete@12:58 That may have been the case decades ago but there are only a handful of states left that recognize common law marriage.
DeleteAnonymous@1:54- Or you can spend your teenage years making God your first priority rather than needing someone else (an imperfect person) to "complete you". Better to spend that time developing your relationship with God and making Him your all in all. Your marriage will be more stable because you both are more mature, with more realistic expectations of each other and the relationship and practicing grace (the work of loving someone).
DeleteSo happy for your beautiful family!
ReplyDelete*have known each other since birth
ReplyDeleteAnd you know this how?
DeleteClaire says in their interview with People magazine that their families have known each other for 20 years. Since She's 19 and he's 17, they have known of each other since birth, just not in a romantic sense until Spring 2019.
DeleteJust because your families might have known each other for 20 years doesn't mean the kids had anything to do with each other. My family had all sorts of friends from before I was born (their Christmas card list was extensive) but if I had ever become engaged to one of the kids in one of those families, I wouldn't claim that I'd known them "since birth." That doesn't make sense.
DeleteWas that Claire in last week's episode, in the hat along with the family, when they presented the greenhouse to Jana?
ReplyDeleteNo that was Jana's friend Laura DeMaise
DeleteI thought the one in the hat was Jana's friend Laura i think her name is.
Deletethat was Laura demasie Jana's best friend
DeleteHEY, I am happy for U 2!!!!!!!! U can say U 2 are Justin, in love, LOL!!!!!!! Good Luck!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI’m not sure such a young aged relationship should be promoted like this, or even be promoted on this blog
ReplyDeleteThis is a blog about the family. Posting their family news is not promoting anything. 🙄
DeleteNothing is being promoted. It is merely a statement of fact.
DeleteI agree with Anonymous @1:51- Being on a reality TV show, talking about the benefits of the courting lifestyle "over the world's idea of dating" is promoting courting. When the family involved is famous for their "unique" lifestyle (extra large families, young couples courting, young marriage, couples seemingly not having to struggle with housing/finances/furnishing a home/finding a job/paying for vacations)-it definitely looks appealing to easily-influenced young and adolescent viewers.
DeleteWell, that's dumb. The blog covers the family news. If my news channel covers a murder, does that mean they promote murder?
DeleteNice pic
ReplyDeletePressuring kids into marrying at such a young age is just wrong on so many levels. I know, some will say it is their free decision to make. But how free is it exactly if it is expected of you and you are not allowed to have any (physical) relationship before marriage?!
ReplyDeleteAnd then they will soon bring children into this world when they are themselves children... Downward spiral, in my opinion.
Have you ever thought that maybe he wants to get married and is not being pressured into it? He looks pretty happy to me.
DeleteWhat does not having a physical relationship before marriage have to do with it being a free decision? That's a really revolting perspective.
DeleteHere is hoping that they will teach possible future children how to care for the planet (which they believe god gave to us, right?).
ReplyDeleteI personally don’t think that has been on the Duggars’ agenda at all... well, at least that way we will all find out quicker whether their is a god or not.
Since they both love the outdoors, God and snowboarding...they should get married, right? She is a very pretty girl but they both are way too young to be headed for the altar. We all know this will happen since their 'relationship' has been made public. How well can you know someone when you can't have a second alone together AND you're too young to know yourself? These parents to NOT give their children wise, practical advice.
ReplyDeleteWe don't actually know this. Josiah's first relationship didn't end in marriage.
DeleteWhile it's trues Josiah's first courtship didn't end in marriage, the Duggars themselves said they learned from their mistake of announcing too early (painful as in their courtship practice, you're knitting the families together as well, so a break-up tears the families apart as well-not to mention going through such a break-up publicly). They said they would do that differently next time. So, if they're announcing, I think it's likely a done deal there's going to be an engagement shortly, followed by a wedding (would be interesting how they handle the usual 1000 guests-maybe social distancing/masks required outdoor wedding).
DeleteMaybe, but they are still early enough in the relationship to break it off. We still don't "know" they will get married.
DeleteLet's put some bets on when they'll get engaged ... his 18th birthday would be a nice occasion. Don't waste any time! Otherwise he might not be married at 20 like most of his siblings ...
ReplyDeleteYeah. I'm thinking the engagement will happen on his birthday or soon after.
DeleteMarried at 20 like most? You mean like 2 of the others?
Delete4:33PM: Josh was 20, Joy-Anna was 19. Spouses, even though not born Duggars, were married very young...Ben 19, Kendra 19, Lauren 19.
DeleteI predict ...engaged in Nov...married by Christmas or even Jan and she will be expecting by next June and the family will be so "surprised "they wouldn't be expecting this as they always say.
DeleteI'm completely shocked! I was not expecting that announcement from Justin.
ReplyDeleteI was hoping he would say he was going to college.
DeleteThey’re such babies. Sad that they’ll probably get engaged the second he turns 18, and get married and have a baby in less than a years time.
ReplyDeleteWhy is that sad? I don't understand why people find other people choosing to live their lives focused on love, family, and togetherness as sad. I wouldn't change getting married and having a baby young for anything. If I could go back, I would do it younger. I have grown up with my husband and am experiencing life with our daughter. I don't see value in spending years and years of life wasting time alone.
DeleteHe is a tv star with lots of money and works for jim bob. His father wil give him a house just like the rest. They can live close to home so the parents can supervice and the duggar girls can help her with the kids.
ReplyDelete6:52am You summed the situation up nicely. I agree with you.
DeleteQuestion: have the Duggar courting rules changed? The picture of Justin and Claire shows them sitting very close together with his arm around her, touching her shoulder. I thought that wasn't allowed. (Maybe their chaperone wasn't paying attention).
No, the rules have definitely changed. Remember Jim Bob directing one of the younger children to get between Jessa and Ben because they weren't allowed to hold hands, even while the while the family joined hands in a circle to pray. Her side is definitely pressed into his chest is the above pics, as well as the People magazine pics. Yet another unexplained deviation from the stated rules.
DeleteWow! 17 is so young to consider marriage.
ReplyDeleteThen they beat the odds
DeleteLynn, your example is anecdotal. I’m glad your cousin’s marriage has been successful but sadly most marriages of 17 year olds are not.
DeleteHer "anecdote" is proof that it is possible.
DeleteI was married at 17 and my husband and I just celebrated our 20 year wedding anniversary. He is my Best Friend 😍
DeleteI never said it wasn’t possible but one shouldn’t make life decisions because someone else was successful. That’s like saying seatbelts aren’t necessary because you didn’t die while not wearing one one time.
DeleteIn 3 months they could be in a courtship, then 3 months later married. Does he make enough money to be able to support a wife and family? Justin doesn't seem mature enough to be ready for all that. S
ReplyDeleteI think they’re already in a courtship
DeleteThis announcement means they are already in a courtship.
DeleteDo these young people have JOBS? They need to grow up and have more life experience before settling into marriage. Why on Earth did JB and Michelle foster this relationship?
ReplyDeleteJobs in the family business. I assume they don't work for free.
DeleteLife experience for a Duggar lad amounts to working for their dad. End of story.
DeleteThey've known each other since last spring? As in spring of 2020? No, they knew each other long before that and were involved at least a year ago. She went to the Duggar Ugly Sweater Christmas Party, December of 2019, and was in the background on that TV episode. Just like Jeremy was spotted in the buffet line at a get-together at the house long before anyone started talking about that relationship. If you pay attention to who's at the house, you'll always spot the future spouses well in advance, before any announcements are made.
ReplyDeleteYes. Obviously they've been fostering this relationship for a while and expect it to culminate in marriage or it wouldn't have been announced on the show.
DeleteIt is possible to have friends over to the house for parties or food. Because they come over doesn't have to mean they are dating some one.
DeleteLol, I remember that, everyone thought he was dating Jana
Delete@10:51 You have to understand that the Duggars don't invite just anyone into their home these days.
DeleteRe 9:20 True. That's how the diary went missing...
DeleteWonder what's going on. Josh was promised to a girl when he started acting up. Letting the kids court very young seems to be the Duggars' way of getting their boys to settle down if there's a behavior problem. Did Justin go to ALERT too?
ReplyDeleteTheir courting relationships are getting younger & younger. Give these kids time to grow up first. Didn't he just graduate from high school?
ReplyDeleteIf this follows the usual pattern, they will "court" for a couple of months, get engaged and be married in 6 months or so. Unbelievable that the parents would foster this activity.
ReplyDeleteActually, by the time we're aware of it, they've been courting for some time, with the families doing events and activities together designed to test their compatibility as well because you're marrying the whole family, not just the guy/girl. They're culture is heavily geared towards including extended family in their week-to-week life.
DeleteWhy? Michelle was 17 when she got married. She is blissfully happy all these years later. Why would she not want that for her child?
Delete@1:46 How do you know she's been blissfully happy? What you see on TV is exactly what they want you to see.
DeleteLovely couple. They look very happy.
ReplyDeleteI am flabbergasted that the parents are on board with this, considering that in their world, courtship, engagement, marriage and pregnancy all happen in rapid succession within a year. Justin is far too young.
ReplyDeleteWhat are they thinking?? No schooling, career, or life experience!! Waaaay too young!
ReplyDeleteIt is not surprising. This is the Duggar way.
DeleteI hope they don’t rush into a marriage .
ReplyDeleteConsidering how the Duggars operate, I think an engagement will happen in a couple of months with a marriage three or four months later. They would not have been allowed to announce this courtship without the expectation of getting married soon.
DeleteWould love to see one of them with a career! There is sooooo much more to life then getting married and having a bunch of kids!
ReplyDeleteIt's very sad that you think working is more valuable and important than building families and having love and relationships in your life.
DeleteAwwww Congrats Justin and Claire! I am so happy for you both! I pray that both of you grow closer to Jesus during this very exciting stage of life! I am really enjoying the single life and bonding with my family, but I am definitely excited for when Jesus brings Mr. wonderful around, that is if it is His will. I am 21 and have never even been on a date. I am totally trusting Jesus! I guess it goes to show that you never know what is in Jesus’ plan for our lives!
ReplyDeleteHannah- I honestly hope you are getting out and meeting new people. Mr. Wonderful is not going to be dropped on your doorstep. I met my husband on a blind date. I dunno if Jesus had anything to do with or not, but we've been married for over 30 years.
DeleteI am a lapsed Christian and am trying hard to get back. I love the hymns they sing at my church but not so much believing the preacher. And I am having a hard time accepting that Jesus gets involved in matchmaking for each of the billions of people on earth. Is that really true?
Delete7:07, the Bible says to acknowledge Him in all our ways, and He will direct our paths.
Delete@7:07 I don't believe God, Jesus or any higher power is planning our lives or choosing our mates. Time, chance, and our own decisions are what drive the paths we follow.
Delete7:07 Nope. There are many people in the world that would make a good spouse for each of us and if a relationship doesn't work out, there are others to choose instead. We may also never meet anyone to marry. Christians have been teaching (without much backup from the Bible) that God will bring that special someone He picked out just for you into your life. Christians, especially women, have been told that God's will for them is to marry and have children. Well I know many single Christians who are now too old for children who have been waiting their entire adult lives for a spouse sent from God. How do you think they feel about this teaching, when it didn't happen for them? It is a hurtful concept and leaves them feeling "less than". Of course, my comment applies only to Christians, not the "billions of people on earth", who seem to be doing just fine in finding someone to marry-- or in choosing not to marry.
DeleteAnonymous @7:07- Reading between the lines here and going out on a limb, guessing maybe you haven't had the best of Church experiences. I'd just like to encourage you to read your Bible for yourself (maybe start with 1 John). God loves you individually, personally. He cares about every part of your life, and He has good plans for you (your present and your future)-plans to give you hope and a future.<3
DeleteThis is just ridiculous oh, the parents should be ashamed for condoning this oh, children should not be in serious relationships heading towards marriage when they are just children. Their brains haven't even finish developing. I just pray the God steps in and helps the right thing to happen. Give these children a chance to grow up before you place them in adult situations
ReplyDeleteThey allowed Josiah to announce a courtship at a similar age that did not end in marriage. In a few weeks Justin will be 18 and a legal adult, perhaps the parents are just as concerned as some of use....you can't legally stop them if this is what they want and going along looks better from a PR perspective.
ReplyDeleteThey would not have announced if they weren't really sure an engagement and marriage are in the works...not after Josiah. I felt so bad for him. It's hard enough to deal with a break-up, worse to have the whole world watching.
DeleteHow so?
ReplyDeleteHe is so young!!! Hopefully this will be a long courtship !!!
ReplyDeleteThey look rather cozy and touch-feely according to the Duggar rules where you're barely supposed to brush against each other.
ReplyDeleteSo I was thinking. Remember when Jessa began courting with Ben, Michelle had to sit in between them in the car seat to keep distance between them. My how times have changed.
DeleteKendra didn't think it was safe to hold Joseph's hand when they were roller blading on a date.
DeleteSoooo true 😏
DeleteI’m glad that the younger kids are taking control of their own relationships and not letting their parents tell them they can’t hold hands🙄 although I’m still not convinced that these two weren’t set up intentionally
DeleteThey have said from the beginning that each couple makes their own rules. Also Bens truck was small ( only three seats) and they had a chaperone it was kinda the only way to be in there without being squished together if that’s was one of their standards. When they were sitting other times like at the swing at his parents house they had no one between them 🤔
DeleteLast spring?? Why would you give false info on that?? They definitely knew each other last november and probably earlier... Strange communication...
ReplyDeleteLast spring as in spring of 2019....
DeleteNo, the last spring we had started 6 months ago. So last spring is 2020.
DeleteThen Justin was veeeery young...
DeleteAhh, they are so cute together! I'm happy for them. I always thought Justin was really nice. He will make such a good husband.
ReplyDeleteA 17 year old child a good husband?
DeleteYes. He absolutely has the ability to be a good husband. They have a very different culture and are very happy in their lives within that culture. There is nothing wrong with that. Keep in mind they don't have the temptations others do, or put a tremendous amount of emphasis on material things and station in life that are usually the issues in marriages. They are happy to be together, be partners, and build a simple, respectful, and enjoyable life together. There is no reason a 17 year old can't do that. I got engaged at 17 and never for a second have I felt too young.
DeleteWow, I totally disagree with 1:43. They definitely have temptations, worse than others because they are denied so many things ("temptations") that others don't consider to be in that category (books, music, movies, to name a few). No emphasis on material things? In a family that owns too many properties to list? A family who has to have warehouses on their property to hold their excess things? They build a simple life together? ON TV?! They're respectful? Maybe of each other, but the buck stops there.
DeleteThey look like they have a combined age of 23. I can’t believe their parents are allowing this.
ReplyDeleteCongrats
ReplyDeleteAnd why on EARTH would you say that? Yeah, it's SO ridiculous for someone to find the one God has for them. YOU are the one being ridiculous, and rude!
ReplyDeleteYou don’t known that they’ll stay together
DeleteFor starters, IMO 17 is too young to be thinking about marriage to anyone. If Justin's relationship is the real deal, waiting a few years won't matter. In Duggar world, divorce is not an option, so it stands to reason you want to take time to make sure you know what you're doing. I'd hardly call that ridiculous or rude to say so.
DeleteLOL -In my world divorce is not an option (barring abuse or cheating). We dated 5 years, with both of us working jobs, going out together/with our friends as a group/each of us hanging out with our individual friends. As we've told our daughter, a lifetime is a long time (God willing) so you want to take your time and be sure (seeing that person in a variety of settings and situations both good and bad). Anyone can put their best foot/face forward and put up a good front-few people can consistently sustain it over time though. Eyes wide open is our motto.
DeleteI wonder if they will announce another courtship tonight on Counting On?
ReplyDeleteThey look like a good couple together, and so happy. I wish them well.
ReplyDeleteThey DO look cute together, and I wish them well, also.
DeleteOn tonight's episode of the dash I thought the complaints about our national dish, haggis, was uncalled for, if they didn't like it that's all they had to say, but to call it nasty was appalling
ReplyDeleteLots of people think haggis is disgusting
DeleteNo they do not
ReplyDeleteAgree , anonymous. This not big new's until they r all married and will be babie's then. Just my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteHe is still just a boy! He does not have the wisdom or maturity to make such a serious commitment! The parents should be preventing this rather than encouraging, although it does make for good tv now doesn’t it!
ReplyDeleteHe is still just a boy! He does not have the wisdom or maturity to make such a serious commitment! The parents should be preventing this rather than encouraging, although it does make for good tv now doesn’t it!
ReplyDeleteHe is still just a boy! He does not have the wisdom or maturity to make such a serious commitment! The parents should be preventing this rather than encouraging, although it does make for good tv now doesn’t it!
ReplyDeleteCourtship is only a semi-serious commitment. You aren't committing to marriage. You're committing to pursue a relationship to see if it should lead to marriage. Our culture could use more serious thought and appreciation of commitment when it comes to relationships.
DeleteMaybe the parents have set up parameters, like they have to wait a certain amount of time before getting engaged, or whatever, because he is still a minor.
DeleteOur 19yr old has set her own benchmarks for "old-fashioned courting" as she puts it (not Duggar-style). She wants to see what the guy's habits are spiritually, financially, and emotionally. How does he treat people in general, women specifically (not just her)? What's his work ethic? She's got specific goals in mind where she wants him and herself to be financially (nod to Dave Ramsey), knowing finances are one of the two biggest marriage stressors.
DeleteCongrats you guys are a cute couple hope and pray everything works out for you guys . Justin the older you get the more you look like Josiah may God bless you both please stay healthy and safe
ReplyDeleteI don't care who the person is or their background, seventeen is way too young for such an important and lifelong decision.
DeleteEverybody is different. For some people, 30 is still too young. For others, seventeen is perfectly fine. My in-laws married when she was 16 and he was 19. They have been married almost 39 years.
DeleteMy husband and I were high school sweethearts who got married at 18 after our freshman year of college. We both went on to earn our bachelors degrees. Then my husband went on to medical school. He’s now an MD. After I worked full time for 5 years in a career I loved, we had our first baby. We now have 5 children and have been married almost 15 years. People used to marry much younger in previous generations. It’s not an age issue. It’s a maturity issue. I don’t know Justin. But one can be mature enough to marry young. It depends on the couple.
Delete10:09, courting is not a lifelong decision. It's a time of deciding whether to proceed to a lifelong decision. Some courtships don't last, as we've seen at least 4 times between the Bates and Duggar families.
DeleteEspecially when a 17-year old boy was raised so protected in such a small world, there is no way this boy can be wise enough to be someones husband... I hope her parents are wise and give them lots of time before they marry.... Hopefully these people are better educated and more trusting than his own parents...
DeleteWhat a lovely photo. Wishing them all the best. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteOur 19yr old daughter knows that before they get to the serious thinking about marriage level, she needs to have known and seen the guy regularly interacting with his mom, sisters, female family members for several years. How does he treat them, his father, elderly relatives/neighbors, his boss? Does he have 6 months worth of real-life expenses saved in the bank? Is he paying his own way or are his parents carrying him (providing him a job, housing, groceries, utilities, car insurance, etc.)? Looking for real-world experience here. If you can't manage your own life on your own, you're not ready to add a wife and future children to the equation. They need to have interests already in common; she's not going to mold herself in his image (mirroring his interests) because that's deceptive. She wants to see his character in action on a weekly basis in a range of settings and situations for quite some time because a lifetime is a long time...and she expects him to be equally discerning about her character.
ReplyDeleteSix months of expenses saved before marriage? Knowing each other for years and watching him interact with his "female family members"? This is absurd and completely unrealistic. What if he doesn't have female family members? What if you want to start your lives together and not languish for years? My husband and I grew up together in our marriage, most definitely did not have savings like that, and we married each other, not our families. We have been married 10 years and are still young enough that we have friends just now getting married. It's ridiculous to put restrictions like that on a person and approach marriage like you are putting them through a job interview. Marriage is about building a life together, not having two lives existing side by side.
Delete@10:14 That sounds very sensible and a recipe for success. The Duggar kids are only encouraged to find someone with their same religion and marry them as soon as possible, before they can't stand not holding hands any longer.
DeleteRemember Jim Bob's discussions about finances with his older kids when they were engaged? They did premarital counseling with some of the kids, others did it with their officiant. They are not new to this as parents and have been teaching their kids from a young age how to have practical skills for making money.
Delete@1:38 You should have 6 months of expenses saved no matter what point you are at in life. Didn't the pandemic layoffs prove that?
DeleteYes, how someone treats others is a very valid indicator of how they will treat YOU. If you're in such a hurry to start your lives together, you may well regret it later when it turns out the person you're married to isn't who you thought they were. Anyone can keep up a romantic pretense for awhile. Nobody can genuinely do it for a lifetime. Rushed engagements and marriages are not a good idea.
Anonymous @ 1:38- Nobody's putting restrictions on marriage. Finances are one of the two leading causes of divorce (ask any family counselor). Family dysfunction from their family of origin is another of the top 5 causes of divorce. We're going on 30 years of marriage and have seen many of our friends and extended family members marriages fail (and all of them would be considered "solid people"). We just want our daughter to lay the best possible foundation long-term. I'm sorry if you find that ridiculous. It beats counseling and broken families. Marriage is about building a life together, but both parties bring baggage into the marriage from their own families (there are no perfect parents, perfect families, or perfect marriages). We want to strengthen weak spots (like communication, financial management, setting healthy family boundaries, etc.). Just passing on what we've learned from our own mistakes and others.
DeleteSo sad to see so many negative comments. They are very young but it’s their lives and I for one simply wish them well.
ReplyDeleteDating HAS a purpose also..it's to get to know the other person wherever it leads or doesn't lead. Don't knock it until you've tried it. So, these two love birds live in different states? That makes it worse IMO. They are way too young and distant from one another to have any type of commitment like marriage. Heck, they aren't allowed to be alone together, even during the daylight, in public like at a shopping mall or restaurant to have coffee together and really speak privately. One cannont know someone without private time together. These parents, all 4 of them, should be ashamed of themselves for encouraging this.
ReplyDeleteSo he's never even been to prom or homecoming (and barely looks old enough for that) but he's eager to be a groom.
ReplyDeleteHe has never been to high school.
DeleteEven though there is a lot of disapproval about Justin courting so young, you can bet everyone will be tuning in to see his courtship, engagement and wedding play out on TV. So I don't think the Duggars mind!
ReplyDelete10:15. It does appear that filming opportunities are the motivation behind much of what they do.
DeleteShe's cute. He looks happy. I think they look like they could be brothwr and sister they are so similar.
ReplyDeleteSomehow I don't see loving the outdoors and snowboarding as a basis for marriage. It's a pity the parents have encouraged this relationship that is built on such a poor foundation.
ReplyDeleteSeriously? Do you think that is all they have in common? They wouldn’t have even started talking unless they shared the same faith and morals. Where they met shows their families have a lot in common!
DeleteThey don't tell us everything. They were just giving info for their public audience, not the whole story.
DeleteReally?? This post doesn't say that the outdoors and snowboarding are the "basis" for their relationship, but most of us know that a common interest or two strengthens a relationship.
DeleteCute girl, but aow, still in braces and almost married seems rather too young, in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteThis must be an older pic since she doesn’t have braces anymore...check out the TLC video. :)
DeleteBraces have nothing to do with it. Adults get braces too.
DeleteIs it just me or does it seem that the Duggar kids always court someone from a family that they have known for years? Its almost like a pre-arranged thing.
ReplyDeleteIt isn’t prearranged. My daughter ended up marrying someone she was friends with at church years ago. My son is dating someone he liked as a teen as well. Sometimes as children get older they realize that they really care in a deeper way for someone they have known for years.
DeleteOf course it is. They select the right family.
DeleteHeaven forbid you get exposed to someone who thinks another way. They might yank you off the TV show someday for starters! Then you have a situation on your hands.
Delete1:50, just not true. Fact is, they know a lot of families with similar beliefs. They have a very large network. But Jill and Jinger didn't marry from those families, and they were some of the earlier brides.
DeleteMaybe that has some truth; since They didn’t know the Dillard’s or Voulo’s families and both those men seem very independent of JimBob!
DeleteJustin seems like a responsible young man. Congratulations to Claire and Justin. God Bless.
ReplyDeleteJoan,Marion and Marilyn
You can tell someone is responsible by a 30 second video?
DeleteHow does her seem responsible?
DeleteHow can you tell anyone is responsible by looking at a picture or two? Up until this week, nobody ever saw Justin in a picture like that.
DeleteTo Neddy Constant, People leave comment's here that are screened by the person who write's the blog. I myself also need a future and believe there relationship are also fixed up by the parent's. Thank younse and have a Blessed Day
ReplyDeleteShe is cute. I have my worries because of Justins age, but i wish them all happiness and love.
ReplyDeleteThe decision to take the Bible out of the public schools back in the 1960s has led to an upside down world where it is considered acceptable to have sexual relations with someone when you are 17, but not ok to marry them. And we wonder why the world is in such a mess!
ReplyDeleteI commend you for saying this...very true.
DeleteWhy would you want to force a Christian Bible on people who are not of that faith? Public school kids come from a wide range of backgrounds. My child's public school has a large percent of kids who speak English as a second language and come from all parts of the world, all religions. You can't have the US government funding public schools AND mandating that they hear the Bible there. That is unconstitutional and frankly, old-fashioned thinking.
Delete100%, 10:50.
DeleteSome people have been commenting that those of us who don’t think such young people should commit to a life long marriage expect teens to be promiscuous. I have 4 children and certainly don’t condone that. I expect my children to get to know a lot of different people, AS FRIENDS. When/if they want to date one of those friends, I encourage them to do so slowly and carefully. I want them to find a partner whom they truly choose with thoughtfulness. My oldest met her boyfriend when she was 21 and my other 3, ages 18, 18, and 20 have not dated at all. They go out with groups of friends and have fun but have not met anyone they want to date. I consider my son a typical 18 year old - he goes to college, lives in a dorm, loves to play video games, and ride his skateboard. He is certainly no prude but has never even kissed a girl. I think young men and women need a lot more exposure to the world than homeschool and church to be mature enough to choose a life partner.
ReplyDeleteWhen my boyfriend and I were both 16, we started living together in her parents’ basement. We used birth control. We both got our GEDs by age 18 and have jobs. We’re 21 now and have our own place and plan to get married this year. I recommend living together rather than marriage at such an early age. I hope Claire and Justin consider this option.
ReplyDeleteYour boyfriend and you started living together in "her" parents' basement? That doesn't make sense. I don't know what state you're in but age 16 is not usually an age of consent. So whatever parents allowed this knew that was going on yet thought it was OK? What kind of parent allows this?
DeleteThat's not going to happen.
DeleteI had guessed jana, jer, or jed next in a courtship. I was way off! Congratulations!
ReplyDeletePeople are way too negative. He called her his girlfriend. He never said anything about engagement or marriage. They may or may not go at a slower pace. People are making way too many assumptions without knowing any facts.
ReplyDeleteApparently you are not familiar with their courting system.
DeleteTrue. People do that all the time now. It drives me crazy.
Delete