Counting On "Guys' Guide to Courting"...
- Jinger, Michelle, Jessa, Ben, and Spurgeon arrive at the airport for their flight to meet up with Jeremy in Dallas. They will then fly to Philadelphia together. At this point, Jinger and Jeremy have been together "unofficially" for five months and "officially" for about three months.
- "Over the past couple of months, Jinger has been in la-la land," says Joy.
- The guys provide courtship tips:
- Derick: Be upfront, honest, and transparent about your intentions
- Ben: "Get to know her family, especially if she has 10 brothers."
- Josiah: Start by spending time around the family.
- Derick: "Set your physical boundaries, and stick to them, even if it means having chaperones." (He and Jill printed off a list of their boundaries and gave it to each of their chaperones.)
- Derick: "Make sure to get in good with Dad."
- Jeremy: "If a young guy asked me if I had any advice in going about asking a father for the permission to date his daughter, I would just say, 'Put yourself in his shoes. Have a bit of respect. Realize that you're not the king of the world.' It's just part of being a man, being face-to-face with another man and asking for his daughter."
- "I think my courtship standards will be pretty high," shares Jedidiah. John-David says he has some relationship guidelines in mind but that he plans to wait to make final decisions until he finds a girl and has talked to her.
- "When I'm married and I'm having to give away my daughters, I want to know that the person who is wanting to marry my daughter [is] the right one and that they're not just there to get the prize and leave," says Joseph, who agrees that it is respectful for guys to consult the father before entering a relationship.
- According to Jill, Derick had the greatest advantage out of any of the guys when asking for permission to court because he already knew Jim Bob well.
- Jeremy admits that he was quite nervous when Jim Bob paused to think for several moments before granting permission. "My dad likes to draw things out a little bit and keep the guys on edge for a little bit when they're asking about one of his girls," explains Jill, laughing.
- The siblings share their thoughts about brother John-David:
- Jinger: an amazing older brother, steady, level headed
- Jedidiah: multi-talented ("He can fly, use heavy equipment...and then he's a police officer.")
- Jessa: hardworking
- When asked what kind of girl they would choose for John-David, here are the siblings' responses:
- Jinger: Brunette, outgoing, country girl, talkative
- Jana: outgoing, country girl, talkative
- Jill: Blonde, shy, country girl, quiet
- Jessa: Brunette, outgoing, country girl, talkative
- John-David says: Brunette, somewhere between outgoing and shy, probably a country girl, someone who is quiet
- Later, the siblings share their thoughts about Joseph, who says he wants a girl who loves God above all else:
- Jessa: steady and reliable
- Jill: Caring
- Josiah is known as the family comedian, a major prankster, and someone who can make creative animal noises.
- Josiah also shares an exciting update: "The older I get, the more I realize how young I am and how much more I have to mature in life, so yes I am interested in somebody, but as I get closer I'm like, 'Whoa, I really have to work on some things.'"
- The siblings say that Jedidiah and Jeremiah are both very mature and eager to learn. Jed has a business mindset, while Jer is more of a diplomat.
Josiah sounds like one of the smartest members of the family. He won't just rush into a courtship like some of his siblings.
ReplyDeleteSomeone needs to tell Joseph that women are human beings, not pieces of property to "give away."
Josiah already rushed into a courtship, remember?! And it fell apart.
DeleteJosiah WAS In a courtship already!
DeleteI was appalled by the statement about "getting the prize"...
DeletePoor Josiah. I bet he would still have a girlfriend if Josh's scandal hadn't come out at the same time. I can understand the parents pulling her away from the relationship after that. :(
DeleteJoseph might think he knows what's respectful, but calling anything to do with dating a girl "get the prize and leave" is totally disrespectful.
ReplyDeleteThey really do think the worst of dating. Wonder who put that in their minds?
DeleteHe was saying that guys SHOULDN'T do that.
DeleteAnonymous 6:53 a.m., the original poster was saying it is disrespectful to suggest going on a date is "getting a prize and leaving." The suggestion is that the woman herself or her time is not the prize, but something else.
DeleteI'm getting strong vibes of them trying to get rid of their single adult kids. Maybe they thought they were being subtle but it was reminded me of those dating shows
ReplyDeleteBeing face to face with a man and asking for his daughter?!?! Do they realize how chauvinistic that sounds :(
ReplyDeleteIt isn't at all! It's a sign of respect!
DeleteI agree that it is simply respect.
DeleteIf it were simply a matter of respect, we would see the women (Jill, Jessa, Jinger, Marjorie, Anna), sitting down with the men's parents to "ask for their son."
DeleteIt's not a sign of respect, but a leftover tradition from a time when women were considered property, and marriage was a business exchange. I think if your parents' blessing is important to you, you'd go to them together to ask for it.
DeleteSo many recaps.... we've seen it all so many times. Less recaps please!
ReplyDeleteThis episode was a nice kickback to 19 kids and counting. I really miss that show, but I'm thankful to have the Duggar family on my TV in one way or another. The list of tips for courting was my favorite part of the episode and this recap.
ReplyDeleteGod bless
Did you notice how they first said John David was a police officer, then right after that they said a "part-time" police officer? Neither are true! He is a constable, an elected position. In Arkansas, constables are paid little (such as $1 a year) or nothing. Uniforms and equipment are paid for by the individual themselves. There is no standard training. Some constables are trained enough to become certified, but others are not. Those who are not certified (which is most of the elected constables in the state) have limited authority. They are certainly not the same as police officers, a salaried position with standardized training and full authority. I get upset when the Duggars make themselves out to be more than they actually are, but when it comes to the family calling John David a "police officer," then that crosses all boundaries of appropriateness. Please post this to clarify about constables in Arkansas and John David's true position in the community. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThanks for bringing that up. I agree, they need to drop that policeman term when talking about John-David.
DeleteLots of people use the terms interchangeably. And to make it sound less important because he doesn't get paid is completely backwards! Thank you, John David, for giving your time for nothing!
DeleteNo, the OP has a good point. As great as it is that he's volunteering his time, it's disrespectful to those men and women who've put in years of schooling, and certification to equate the two, and to act like there's no difference.
DeleteYou may use those terms interchangeably, but you sure can't use the positions that way. Why embellish the truth? It's not fair to all the men who did full police academy training and wear that uniform Would you call a school crossing guard a policeman? If not, then you see there's a line. Constable does not equal policeman. I don't believe JD is doing this for nothing. I think he has political aspirations, with his father's backing. This is step one...
DeleteA constable is not a policeman. They were wrong to call JD that. Don't they understand the difference?
Delete@7:40. How about all the women too. It's not just a "man's" job.
Delete"Men" in the terms of talking about John David being a constable and not a policeman, 10:18. If JD were compared to a policewoman, whoooo, can't do that! LOL
DeleteI think John David would have already been running for political office locally, except the Josh news broke. What happened to Josh in DC scared his brother. It certainly didn't help the Duggar name politically, either.
DeleteTo be honest, I think this show would really benefit from being like a once or twice a year special instead of a regular show! There's what, like 10-15 minutes of new footage per show? Not to mention most of it seems fake, or just done for the sake of the show (I'm looking at you Ben, and your football camp). Add on that MORE rehashing of courtships even though they've done this countless times before, and I really think they should just film the genuine, major life events (engagements, marriage, moving, children, graduation or new jobs, etc) and maybe do a "check in" with some of the kids to see what's new with them. So much of this show now is just sooooo dull
ReplyDeleteThank you all for standing up for what is Noble, Right, Pure, Lovely! I'm thankful there are a few families like you and the Bates who are doing it right in the eyes of the Lord. :o) And your on TV....we need you out there!!
ReplyDeleteKelly
I did watch your show when it was on because I don't know its nice to see people have this much love for God and big family but I have to say you guys are being very narrow minded. You say you Pray to god your children won't be gay but honestly God has already created them to be exactly how they should be and it is not your place to judge someone if they are gay or not. I have a niece who is gay and I love her either way she can't help how she feels and who she is and it is not my place to judge. You cannot continue to say things that seem like your insulting people who are happy just the way they are. God wants everyone to love everyone regardless of who they are and where they came from. I think you guys need to be educated just little bit more and think outside the box instead of staying in a unrealistic bubble. I would hate to see one of your children get severely depressed because they think they can't come to you and be honest about who they are for fear you will condemn them. You surely have learned nobody is perfect from Josh and we all have are battles to fight, it is our job to love them and fight together. Very disappointing you guys are acting that way towards gay people i thought your were better than that but guess I'm wrong. #I don't think I can be fan anymore.
ReplyDeleteGod made us to be together as man and woman Not the same gender together. That is obvious even if you do not read the Bible or believe it. Lets see two girls reproduce and continue the population of the earth- impossible. People who insist on living that lifestyle are being rebellious and driven by satan.
DeleteSin is very real, and any one of us who are followers of Christ, can stumble and fall when we don't keep close to God. How is it, that praying for your children to keep to God's pathway wrong? According to your statements above, I see our worldviews don't match up. The Duggar parents, as I see it, are trying to live out the truth regardless of what the "world/society" says. More of us followers of Christ should do the same.
DeleteAnon @3:43 Using your logic, it would then be a lifestyle "driven by satan" if someone never gets married because they are defying their purpose of reproducing and married couples who choose not to have children are being "rebellious." The Bible was written over hundreds of years by many different people and there's no proof that it was all inspired by God. ( People, mostly men at that time, had their own agendas.) It has been a source of conflict for centuries. It seems ludicrous to believe that ANYONE has a proper understanding of it.
Delete3:43, I seriously doubt whether the earth cares if two women love each other and never reproduce. You should be celebrating people who find love and live in love instead of condemning them. Isn't there enough hate in the world already without adding another entire community of people to the list?
DeleteThis show made me wonder if they were trying to advertise some of the kids as available for courtships. It was a like a dating tape you'd see online. It really turned me off. The boys are inexperienced and they looked shallow being asked if they want a blonde or brunette. Are those the most important questions? I felt this made the people giving answers very shallow as well. Is there nothing more substantive to discuss, dating or otherwise? I'm really seeing this show go downhill and it seems they are desperate for another courtship to keep this going.
ReplyDelete"Brunette, Blonde, Brunette, Brunette". As a Red-Head I guess I need not apply as I obviously wouldn't pass the first qualifier on the list. It's looks by the way...not personality that all but Jana mentioned first.
ReplyDeleteI don't think any woman going through chemotherapy need apply, either. Or ones with the autoimmune disease alopecia. Or anyone who goes prematurely gray.
DeleteEven us worldly folks have the sense to know that hair color is immaterial.
DeleteWhat about noticing a girls countenance first? To notice a girl's haircolor..being attracted to it...isn't that getting into "Nike" territory?
DeleteExactly! They don't mention countenance anymore.
DeleteI wonder if they'll show Jeremy asking JimBob for Jingers hand in marriage?
They always said they didn't watch TV because it's a distraction and takes away time from each other. Don't cell phones and social media ( which they had said they don't do) do the same thing? IMO Internet and social media can be more dangerous than TV.
I can't believe they care about hair color. They talk as if you order your bride from a catalog.
ReplyDeleteThey were just answering a question the TLC people asked them.
DeleteAgreed - TLC producers, that was a new low.
DeleteThey were just kidding around, saying what they'd "prefer." Me and my siblings do it all the time. It doesn't mean we wouldn't consider someone with a different color hair than we prefer.
Deletethey may just have been answering a question, but a thoughtful answer would have been "hair colour and other physical attributes are not important. It is about character and values"
DeleteI have been watching the Duggars for a number of years and I have to say that this episode was dull and boring. Who really cares what the boys want in a wife? Just answering the questions put to them by the producers bored me. The show makes it looks like the adult kids are somewhat nonchalant about courting but it is obvious that when a Duggar meets somebody special the whole family's life seems to revolve around it. Courting and having new babies - seems like that is the most important thing in their lives. Gets redundant. And, having so many recaps of past shows was just way too much!
ReplyDeleteGood gracious! Seems like anytime someone tries to do what's right all you get in return is a host of nasty comments and speculation! Keep up the good job, Duggars. You are in our prayers and being a tremendous light in this dark world!
ReplyDeleteInteresting comments about John being a policeman vs constable. Since the moderators know them personally can they please get the truth behind John David's position?
ReplyDeleteThank you for being open and providing a resource of Godly wisdom. I appreciate your continued authenticity in the midst of all the harsh judgmental comments. Please keep shining His love because many lives are blessed through your examples!!
ReplyDeleteI thought it was really bad to ask those questions about a future wife. It was almost like posting a profile of preferences on a dating site. Everyone involved in this show should know better than to go anywhere near that nonsense.
ReplyDeleteSo we saw their "guide to courting." I'd like to know what Mr. Duggar would have done had he been the father of Anna, and a boy like Josh came to him to ask for Anna's hand. And if that boy was truthful about his past. Would the two kids be married today if that were the case?
ReplyDeleteNot sure what Jim Bob would do. But we know Anna's parents knew and still encouraged her to marry Josh, if that tells you anything.
DeleteI have a legitimate question here, not a nasty one: Do the fan/followers of the Duggar family think that is is "ok" for a 26 year old man to still be sharing a bedroom with much younger brothers? From John-David, down on to Jed and Jer, it's just not normal to be sleeping with young boys in the same room. It's the same with their daughters; Jana is a grown woman who is still sharing a room, and probably still sharing her bed with a 6 year old Josie...just not healthy if you ask me. thank you for your response to this question.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, we haven't been given the most recent sleeping arrangements for the family. For all we know, John David may have his own house. Who knows? Jana supposedly bought a property/business, but the public doesn't know any more, nor does it have a right to know.
DeleteI thought the parents made it clear on a previous program that unmarried children could not live on their own. There was no accountability partnering that way, and accountability was an inflexible rule. Besides, John David has talked about the girls doing his laundry, remember? So he's probably still in the house.
DeleteJana's building purchase, or the purchase that was put in Jana's name, was available to view online as a real estate listing. It's not somewhere where a person could live. It needs major renovation, for starters.